THE HALLOWEEN VISITATION, A Cocktale Story of Horror and Vodka

A Cocktale of Horror and Vodka
By The Martini Diva

Once upon a late night dreary,
as I sat most weak and weary,
to sip some Crystal Head alone
and rest my soul and ease my bones,
there came a knocking at my door.

Knock, knock, knocking at that door,
They kept on knocking evermore!
I dragged my feet across the floor,
(while under breath I softly swore.)

Upon my stoop were birds galore;
at least a gang of ten or more!
Raven black and swathed in gore,
they whispered from their spectral corps, 
"We cannot find a liquor store,
would you share your vodka pour?"

Shocked was I, and very leery,
Black birds begging booze? 'Twas eerie!
So to these specters this I said, 
"Be gone you crows, you spirits dread!
You cannot have my Crystal Head!
So do not beg, do not implore,
I share this Vodka NEVERMORE!"

They took no heed, they would not stop!
So at their heads an ax I chopped.
Feathers flew and squawks arose, 
it froze me right straight to my toes!
When at last their cries grew still,
I threw their corpses on the grill.
Some lemon juice, some herbs, fine ground;
my dinner soon began to brown.
When they were done, most nicely roasted,
With Crystal Head to them I toasted.

©2014 by TheMartiniDiva.Com

Thanks to Crystal Head Vodka and  BevMo for the inspiration.

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I've already done several Candy Corn Martinis, including my original, my Sparkling Candy Corn Martini and my Candy Corn Creeptini as well as my Candy Corn Vodka. But when I happened on some fun, over sized candy corn gummy candies, and remembered that October 30th is National Candy Corn Day, I had to add this recipe to my Halloween cocktail line up, cocktail being the operative word since this old family recipe won't fit in a martini glass!
In fact, it doesn't go in a glass at all, it goes in a jar! Serving cocktails in jars is a trending thing lately. I think it has to do with the popularity of modern day moonshine and, since this is made with homemade candy corn moonshine inspired by my Granny's recipe, it's a perfect fit. After all, it is Corn Moonshine!
First, you have to distill your
Candy Corn Moonshine!
(Since I don't have Granny's still anymore and can't brew up some real corn likker, I've had to make some modern day adjustments to the old family recipe.):
1 Cup Candy Corn Gummy Candy
1 Bottle of Vodka
Combine together in a 2 quart canning jar and let this sit a spell while the candy dissolves. A good 24 hours ought to git 'er done. Shake the bottle up good whenever you pass by. Once your candy has mostly dissolved, strain the whole passel of 'shine through a clean cloth into a nice clean mason jar. No need to age, Granny never did.

1/2 C. Candy Corn Moonshine (Vodka)
1/4 C. Pineapple Juice
1/4 C. Orange Juice
Juice of Half A Lemon
1 Tablespoon Grenadine
Orange Sugar Crystals
Candy Corn Gummies
Half Orange Slices
Dip your glass rim into some of that there candy corn moonshine then into the orange sugar crystals then chill in the ice box. (The good 'un in the house, not the old 'un on the porch) Add the lemon juice, orange juice, pineapple juice and candy corn moonshine to a large jar filled with ice and shake 'er up 'til chilled. Pour into a nice cold jelly jar filled with some fun ice cubes, float the grenadine (which will sink to the bottom) and make it right purty with the candy corn gummies and slices of orange.
Sit on yer porch and enjoy but put yer shotgun in the cupboard. Ya'll don't want to mistake the li'l Trick or Treaters for the revenuers while yer in yer cups!
FYI, here's just a few other names for moonshine:
White Lightening, Kickapoo Juice, Blue John, Cat Daddy, Hooch, Happy Sally, Mountain Dew, Red Eye, Rot Gut, Tennessee White, Wild Cat
Another bit of moonshine trivia:
NASCAR grew out of moonshining! Yep, those good ole boys who learned their driving skills on the backroads of moonshine country took the souped up cars they designed to outrun Johnny Law to the racetracks after Prohibition and so began the start of NASCAR! Read more about the beginnings of NASCAR and Junior Johnson here.
Here in moonshine country we don't hide crazy. We parade it on the porch and give it a cocktail!
~ Anonymous

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DIRTY Bloody Mary

Every body's heard of a Dirty Martini but how many of you have tried a Dirty Bloody Mary? It's one of my favorite ways to enjoy a Bloody and I really like enjoying Bloody Marys. I love how the olive brine cuts the sweetness you can sometimes experience with bottled tomato juices. Plus it gives me a great excuse to load up on the olive garnishes.
This is also a great way to drink some "hair of the dog" to combat the toxic waste of overindulgence! Which is why this glass with the skull and crossbones is a perfect vessel. It also looks really nice with my bottle of Crystal Head Vodka which is a great quality vodka for a great drink! And it's a pretty cool look for a Halloween cocktail.
Below is my personal recipe for a
2 Oz. Crystal Head Vodka
6 Oz. Tomato Juice
3 Drops Chipotle Hot Sauce
4 Drops Worcestershire Sauce
1/4 Tsp. Prepared Horseradish Sauce
Juice of 1/4 Lime
1 Tbsp. Olive Juice
1 Tsp. Celery Powder
1/2 Tsp Garlic Powder
Cracked Black Pepper
Sea Salt & Smoked Paprika for Rim
Assorted Garnishes, like celery sticks, olives, pickled green beans
Mix together the sea salt and smoked paprika in a flat plate. Dip your glass rim in some tomato juice then into the sea salt and paprika mixture. Fill glass with ice balls then tap the drops of chipotle hot sauce on the ice. Add the Worcestershire sauce, horseradish, celery powder, garlic powder, olive juice, sea salt to your taste and black pepper then pour in the vodka and tomato juice. Stir until well mixed, squeeze in the lime juice and garnish with a good bunch of edible snacks.
Keep Calm and Drink A
Dirty Bloody Mary!

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Halloween isn't complete without a worm or two to serve to your ghoulish guests. Your Halloween creep factor rises by serving some slimy but sweet little wriggling critters who met their demise by drowning in rum.


First you have to make your Gummy Rum and you'll need a full day for the worms to decompose so plan ahead! To make your dead worm juice simply take 30 orange and red sour gummy worms and pour 8 ounces of white rum over them, shaking often to speed up the decaying process of the worms. Strain out whatever leftover worm carcasses are left, bottle and chill.


1-1/2 Oz. Gummy Rum
1/2 Oz. Pineapple Juice
Black and Orange Cake Sprinkles
Gummy Worm Garnish.


Dip the rim of a shooter into pineapple juice then into the sprinkles. Pour in the chilled Gummy Rum and top off with the pineapple juice. Lay a gummy worm over the rim.
Shoot or sip, watch out for the worm!

Pleasure only starts once the worm has got into the fruit, to become delightful happiness must be tainted with poison.
~ Georges Bataille

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I can't let one more Halloween go by without a nod to my youth and one of the most iconic rock bands of the Flower Power generation, The Grateful Dead.
Yes, my fellow Deadheads, below is your passport back to the past, The Perfect Trip - cocktail style - Truckin' in just in time for All Hallows Eve!
1-1/2 Oz. Light Rum
Splash Purple Grape Juice
2 Fresh Lime Quarters
4 Oz. Club Soda
Tablespoon Agave Syrup
Fresh Purple Grapes, split in half
12 Leaves Fresh Mint
Lime Twist
Mint Sprig
Small Ice Block to fit glass

Chill your glass in the freezer. Pop the mint in between your palm to release the oils. Muddle the mint, lime quarters and grapes in the bottom of your glass to release grape and lime juice. Add your ice and pour the agave syrup over the ice, add your rum, soda and stir to mix. Top off with the grape juice and garnish with mint sprig, lime twist and a few full grapes. I slid my grapes onto the straw and then popped out the itty bitty grape meat cylinders after inserting each grape.
If you peek closely, you might spy Jerry's skeleton frozen in time in the ice.
(Yes, I froze a nicely cleaned skeleton in the ice block and as the ice slowly melts UP pops Jerry!)

Play Grateful Deads' "Friend of the Devil" - Skeletons from the Closet while you sip!

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Nuts are a wonderful addition to cocktails, whether you use a nut infused alcohol, like Nocino*, a nut syrup like Orgeat, nut bitters or just add some to your glass rim for extra flavor and texture. Nuts can add depth of flavor and subtle nuances to a cocktail that surprise and delight your palate.
Since it's National Nut Day I thought it was a good time to share
Almond Butter Crunch Martini
Candied Pecan Martini
Candied Pecan Mudslide
Chocolate Pecan Martini
German Chocolate Cake Martini
Joy of Almond Martini
Nutella Martini
Peach Praline Martini
Pecan Pie Martini
And let's not forget the Nut Infusions:
Candied Pecan Liqueur
(Coming soon: My currently infusing Toasted Maple Walnut Bourbon!)
Now go out there and go a little 40 proof nuts!
*Nocino is an Italian green (unripe) walnut infused liqueur

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Making Brandied Fruit is easy and a great homemade holiday gift project. Brandied fruits are wonderful over ice cream, cakes, pancakes and bread puddings and they make lovely additions to cocktails as well. And don't forget about adding to the stuffing of a holiday bird or some pork chops!
You want to use ripe, unmarred fruit with no bruises or damage and a good brandy (or cognac). I use a VSOP (Very Superior Old Pale) or VO (Very Old) brandy which has been aged at least 4 years. You can also use dried fruits and you can combine fruits for a "signature" blend.
Feel free to add flavors with spices like vanilla beans, anise stars, cardamom seeds or the zest of lemons and oranges as well. Even chilies and peppercorns can bring unexpected depth of flavor! Add these to the jar just before sealing up.
5 Cups of Fruit
5 Cups Sugar
4+ Cups GOOD 80 Proof Brandy
(You'll need enough to completely cover the fruit. Any leftover can be saved for cocktails!)
Large Mixing Bowl
4 Sterilized Pint Glass Jars with Sealable Lids
Mix the fruit and sugar in a large bowl and allow mixture to macerate for a minimum of an hour, tossing every 15 minutes.
Divide the fruit mixture between the jars and fill remainder of jar with your brandy, leaving about half an inch head space.
Cover and let infuse for a MINIMUM of a month, shaking occasionally. Keep in mind the longer your fruit is allowed to soak in that lovely brandy the better it will be!
Label and give as a gift or just keep for yourself!
Some say you can add more fruit and brandy to the jar as you use it up, however I prefer making fresh batches to keep the aging controlled. Your brandied goodness can last up to nine months, more if refrigerated, just make sure the fruit is completely submerged in the alcohol at all times.
You can use the juice as a replacement in any BRANDY COCKTAIL.
Enjoy. YES, you can eat it right out of the jar with a spoon!
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